Hi! My name is ~*D*~ and I am a stress eater. When I am stressed, I binge. Anything sweet or salty in my path will be put in my mouth, chewed and swallowed without thought, regardless of calorie count, lack of protein and carb overload.
Regardless of how hard Will Power tries to guard the gates of my mouth to refuse entry to those things listed above he is constantly defeated by Lady Stressed-A-Lot. Will Power wakes up every morning and marches me to my blender where I make a yummy tasting protein shake and tells me I will only drink water until morning snack when I will eat a stick of low fat string cheese, again followed by water until lunch time. But then that bitch, Lady Stressed-A-Lot comes around while I'm trying to do my daily tasks and prepare for our upcoming move. Once she makes an appearance all hope for Will Power is gone. She bashes him repeatedly over the head with things like brownies (big thick brownies with marshmallows and walnuts), Pringles, Swiss Cake Rolls and sometimes even boxes of Girl Scout cookies. Why is that bitch only likes sweet calorie laden chocolate shit? Why can't she be a flippin' vegetarian and force carrot sticks, broccoli and cauliflower down my throat?
I am aware I am stress eating and I am trying soooo hard to stand up with Will Power and make the right choices but I am Lady Stress-A-Lot's bitch. She controls me and she knows it. I want Will Power to win...I know I can't eat like this for the next two months...I can't even let it go on the next two weeks. But how do I stop her?
I'm fine at meal times. I'm eating the right portions and I am full. I am not hungry but I am still turning to food to comfort me. Maybe it's because hubby isn't ever here to see me, lack of physical friends, the fear of having even fewer physical friends in two months and seeing even less of hubby. Maybe it's dealing with the move, trying to find another job, helping the kids cope and doing it all alone. Sometimes it's just too hard to be everything to everyone and food is that friend I can always turn to. It's not going to tell me I'm not good enough. It's not going to tell me I knew what I was getting into when I married him when this isn't what I signed up for. It's not going to judge me when I'm resentful that he gets to chase his dreams while mine stagnate. It will give me comfort when nothing else can and therefore, I will probably always succumb to it.