F.T.S. !!!!! *edited*

That's my abbreviation for "Eff the Scale".  I want to throw the damn thing out the window and watch it burst into a million little pieces.  Maybe I'll set it up on the fence and take the pellet gun to it?  Whatever!  The damn thing is NOT my friend and I hate it.  It WILL NOT MOVE!!!!

C'mon!  I just had a fill and that first week the numbers went down, down, down and I saw a new low.  Then *bounce* it went right back to 195.  I have been stuck between 194 and 197 for months!!!!!

I have been super vigilant about what I'm eating...I'm seriously only eating once or twice a day.  No snacking.  I actually have some restriction and hunger just don't come around  like it used to.  I've also been making a conscious effort to move more.  Even at work, walking laps around the unit just to move, volunteering for the lab runs.  So why?!  Why isn't the damn scale moving?!!!! 

I really thought I could see 189 last week, but no....went right back to the status quo!  Amusingly enough, it must not have been level on the floor because one day it read 343lb!  That was 100+ over even my heaviest weight....but it got me thinking....if I had started my journey at 343lbs instead of 219lbs, I'd probably have lost close to 100 by now instead of just a measley 27.  Which got me thinking some more:

Is there anyone out there who started their lapband journey with  less than 100lbs to lose? Did the weight just melt off like it seems to do with those who started out with more to lose?  Or was it also more of the (unbearably) "slow and steady"? 

Dammit, I'm ready for size 14's and a new flippin' wardrobe.  I hate that everything I wore two years ago (when I was this size) still fits.  I hate that after I had my son, I went from 212 to 185 in about 3 months with the help of phentermine.  Now I eat about the same amount of calories as i did then with the same amount of movement and the scale won't budge.  I feel like I'm destined to be stuck at this point forever...and it's not a horrible place to be stuck at because honestly, with a tummy tuck, lipo and and a lower body lift I could probably be happy with my body...heck even with just a tummy tuck I'd be pretty content.

*sigh*

Edited to add:  God apparently has a sense of humor!  From the Facebook app "God Wants You to Know":

"God doesn't create faulty life. No. Everything created by God is perfect, and so are you. So stop driving yourself mad with endless ways to improve, and just accept the glory of your being as is. "



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